


Coming Home

by phamnotof



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Coming Out, M/M, fluff fest central, year 2019
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-23
Updated: 2016-04-23
Packaged: 2018-06-04 00:06:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,240
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6632740
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/phamnotof/pseuds/phamnotof
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In the end, they don't come out. They come home.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Coming Home

2019 is by far the craziest, hardest and most wonderful year yet. The second US tour takes so much out of them, and by the end, when they’re lying on a bed in a hotel room and talking about the future, one thing is clear.

They won’t be renewing their lease again.

They discuss a lot of options. Trying to buy the flat they’ve turned into a home, marked up with stories of a such a good live, stories both overshared and untold, memories made up of pain, joy, video games, clumsy accidents and so much love it’s impossible to put into words.

But they know they want a whole life together. They’re a forever deal. They both want a dog, Phil actually wants a small zoo, Dan wants a pool – and they want kids, someday. Not for a while, not until they lead a much calmer life, but they see them.

They see them when there’s an Indigo League rerun on TV and Dan’s eyes sparkle with the idea of sharing the adventure with a bundle of joy too young to understand what’s happening on the screen. They see them when it’s dark and they’re whispering their favorite names into the air, somehow feeling like the moment is too holy to speak up. There’s an actual physical ache in Phil’s chest when they see Louise’s second born for the first time, so tiny and warm and pure.

But there’s no rush. They know it’s going to happen with such certainty that they’re comfortable taking their time.

They briefly consider moving to America. LA would make their jobs easier, they could get lost in a sea of strangers, they could go on new adventures. But it’s never more than a fleeting thought. It’d be too fast for them, too plastic. They’d miss their friends and their families. And really, they’ve gotten quite used to British weather by now.

They know they want a house even before they start talking about their options, really. Money’s good, they’re more than ready, and the gardening possibilities are extremely exciting to Phil.

“Should we look for something outside of London though?” asks Dan, his head leaning against Phils chest, glaring at the walls of the hotel room. He can’t wait to be back in the UK, his mind never having quite gotten used to the time change and feeling a bit too drowsy for comfort most of the time.

“I guess,” Phil says. “I mean, I love it, but it won’t be the best for when we're… older,” he says carefully.

Dan smiles with satisfaction. “Yeah, can’t quite imagine being 70 and still trying to navigate the tube. I mean..,” he pauses. “Unless teleportation’s perfected by then.”

“Don’t be silly,” Phil says. “Of course it’ll be perfected by then. But I imagine it’s not the best for your bones when you’re that age,” he cackles. Dan rubs his cheek against the material of Phil’s shirt, almost purring with how content he feels.

“I imagine not,” he nods with mock-seriousness.

“So,” Phil continues. “Brighton? It’s what all the cool kids seem to be doing these days.”

“Maybe,” Dan agrees. “We’ll look into it.”

-

In the end, they choose a place that still gives them a London address but also far more privacy and comfort. They’ll have to suffer through their friends’ endless teasing about being suburbs people, but the house is worth it. There are Cypress trees planted around the fence, providing both shelter and an excellent Christmas decoration ground. There’s enough room in the garden to put three pools in. They begrudgingly settle for one, at least for the time being. The main door is bright red, which they deem just enough of a cliché to be fun. And the house itself is – it’s perfect. It’s not new, but has been reconstructed thoroughly. It has thick walls and gorgeous big windows and is big enough to accommodate all of their memories as well as their dreams.

It feels solid. It feels them.

Decorating is where they really indulge. They spend weeks going through fancy magazines, they make sketches on napkins, determined to do everything themselves.

They each have a study, comfy and filled with knickknacks they’ve collected through the years spent together, Phil’s painted in bright colors, Dan’s sleek and stylish. They’ll film most their videos in there – but their bedroom is going to be off limits to the public. A king-sized bed on a slight platform, an inside joke between the two of them, surrounded by plushies. The walls remain white – but they’re not empty. Dan and Phil fill them with pictures. Of their friends, of their families, of their vacations. Pictures notoriously known to the public and pictures never seen by anyone outside their circle. Of their first date, eyes sparkling with fear and excitement. Of the first time that Phil visits Dan’s house, sofa-bound for the night, grinning into the camera knowingly. Of their Manchester flat, of moving and putting their furniture together while sipping on wine. Of them dancing at PJ and Sophie’s wedding. Of them in their hotel room in Japan, stupidly reluctant to get out of bed. They have three bathrooms and a guest room and two more rooms that they walk around with the best kind of a nervous feeling.

They call the dog Allen, in honor of their first book. It’s a furry little thing that constantly demands attention and bites their ankles gently when it doesn’t receive enough.

No videos go up for three weeks when they’re moving. No live shows happen, and they only tweet about being busy occasionally, but other than that, they’re completely silent and their friends have been instructed to do the same.

The internet is restless by the end of it. Did they have a fight? Are they going their separate ways after all? After all this time? Are they on their honeymoon?

They share the most outrageous theories and giggle over them while having their cereal in the morning. Dan’s favorite is the one where someone said he’s moving to the US to live with Cat because she’s mentioned getting back together with a soon-to-be-named ex in one of her vlogs and Phil had to check into intensive therapy due to Dan’s decision.

“It is time though, right?” Phil asks on their third night officially moved in. They’re relaxing on the couch, Allen slotted in between them, slobbering on Dan’s thigh happily.

“Time for what?” Dan plays coy, hinting at the fact that it’s about the tenth time they’ll be having this conversation just this month.

“For me to finally do your mum, obviously,” Phil laughs, poking his tongue cheekily. Dan snorts.

Yeah, they’re ready. Maybe they’ve always been.

“I don’t want to make a tearful coming out video,” Phil states firmly when they actually set out to make an outline – or, really, just figure out what they want to do.

“Because it’s so 2015?” Dan smiles fondly. “But yeah, obviously, me neither, I think we’re sort of beyond that. We’re in for one giant ‘Duh’ anyway, so I figure we might as well have some fun with it.”

“Yes, plus – I dunno, I’ve been loudly out for almost 15 years now to everyone that knows me beyond my channel. It’d feel… fake,” Phil shrugs.

“But at the same time…” Dan starts.

“…we do wanna do something,” Phil starts to grin.

“A gesture, if you will,” Dan cackles.

“Because everything feels sort of…” Phil says.

“Big. Life-altering. Epic. Too much not to scream into the world,” Dan finishes.

“Yeah,” Phil nods and leans in to peck Dan’s lips gently. “Something like that.”

*

For a while time, they want to call the video 'Putting Down Roots’. What actually stops them is that there’s far too many gardening puns for them to go through to ever choose from them.

They sort of know the video’s going to be a big deal. Every big name who has done anything similar so far – even Zoe talking about being demisexual last year – has drawn a lot of attention, the views have spiked and the follower counts have risen. They mostly consider that a beautiful thing, the kind that makes it impossible not to feel hopeful about humanity.

'We Get a Dog!!!’ is another working title. They cuddle Allen in the guest bedroom, laugh and occasionally answer a fan question. They might post that eventually, but it’s not the grand thing they want.

'We’re So Happy That We Just Had To Make This Video’ is Phil’s favorite, but Dan vetoes it.

In the end, it’s PJ who gives them the idea. They have a no-tweets-yet-but-a-lot-of-pizza house warming party and their friends surprise them with a giant cake that has a photo of them from the day they met. They absolutely don’t cry.

When PJ presents them with it, he can’t help but make a small speech. “The thing is, everyone here knows that the two of you are that annoyingly special made-from-the-same-star kind of soulmates that makes every decent human want to barf,” he laughs kindly. “So I don’t want to talk about your relationship here. I’m saving that for the wedding speech, thank you very much,” he bows, everyone claps and Dan hides his face in Phil’s shirt, red and delighted. “What I do want to say is that that seeing you from knowing each other a few months and not yet daring to understand this rare thing you have to this, to making a home out of walls, some cement and love, that has been a distinct pleasure and an honor. So,” he raises his glass, “to coming home and to a lot more moments like this one.”

“To coming home,” Dan and Phil repeat, eyes sparkling.

*

There are two videos.

The first one is put up on Dan’s channel. It’s Titled 'Coming…’ and at first, it’s just Dan talking, because he’s got a little more to clear up, some old anger to put to rest, peace to make. For himself, mostly.

He keeps the past hurts pretty vague, mentions being protective of his privacy and under a lot of pressure with his channel becoming what it has and the Dan and Phil brand growing the way it did. He doesn’t mention Phil beyond that, just lets the tension build. Phil himself looks at him fondly from behind the camera as they film that part.

Then he jumps into the frame excitedly, saying: “I’m here, too!”

“And do you wanna explain why you’re here, Phil?” Dan smiles cheekily.

“We’ve got an exciting announcement to make!” Phil exclaims.

“Do we?” Dan asks.

“As you might have noticed,” Phil says, “we’ve got a brand new background!”

“Did we get abducted by aliens? Did we buy an office in town? Did we redecorate our flat?” Dan wonders, making dramatic eye-contact with the camera. “Well I guess you’ll have to watch the second part of this video to find out!”

The link takes everyone to Phil’s channel, where the second video, titled ’…home’, has been uploaded. 

“We got a house!” they yell in unison, unable to keep the too-wide grins off their faces.

“It’s amazing, you guys,” Dan says. “There's… Where are you going? Sick of me already?” he ask Phil confusedly as he has, for some reason, left the frame and wondered out of the door.

Dan’s grin is back within a few second as he hears an exited bark coming from the kitchen.

“Right. We didn’t just get an amazingly symmetrical, huge and beautiful house,” Dan says.

“We also got a child!” Phil yells out from the hallway.

“Right. Just went to the pond shop and picked up a toddler. You heard it here first,” Dan laughs.

“Drum roll, please!” Phil says and Dan reluctantly obliges. “Meet Allen!” he sits the dog on his lap as he falls back onto the sofa. It wiggles its tail excitedly.

“Our firstborn,” Dan puts a hand on his heart. “He’s got my eyes, don’t you think?”

“And my sense of style,” Phil adds, pointing at the bowtie around its neck.

“Hopefully, the next one we have is slightly less fury,” Dan says, petting Allen lightly.

“Are you gonna leave that in?” Phil mock-whispers.

“I have to edit this?” Dan groans.

“Yep. You owe me. I did the last three gaming videos,” Phil shrugs. “Right, Allen?”

“Well this is nice. Teaming up against me with the child already,” Dan complains.

“You love it,” Phil retorts.

“Aaanyway… we will show you some parts of the house eventually,” Dan says to the camera, barely able to tear his eyes away from the image of Phil cuddling the puppy vigorously.

“But for now, we just wanted to let you know. This is what we’ve been up to!” Phil gestures around the room.

“It’s been the most exhausting thing I can recall doing since being birthed,” Dan adds. “And I loved every second of it.”

*

They close their laptops right after the videos go up. They’ll check eventually, to see the extent to which the internet breaks, but for now, there is still a few places in the house left to christen, the kitchen counter being the first on the list.

“Oh, crap!” Phil says after a particularly satisfying round on the living room rug. “We forgot to actually say we’re together, didn’t we?”

Dan wrinkles his eyebrows momentarily: “I guess we did,” he laughs. “But I think it’s pretty obvious by now.”

**Author's Note:**

> reblog on tumblr if you're so inclined! http://pheelsamazinglynotonfire.tumblr.com/post/139044531345/coming-home


End file.
